Train Wreck
by crazy4castle
Summary: When Beckett and Castle get stuck on a train, will they be able to get their relationship back on track? Another round of fluffy nonsense.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N You guys were all so wonderful and kind to me, I decided to give this another shot. For some reason I'm more nervous this time. Dropping me a review to say anything would really mean the world. I'm not one for begging for them, but knowing you would like me to continue and see where this goes, would make my nervous day.**

**Another small thing, I have this already written. So like last time, updates will be frequent. Let me know how often suits you. Daily or every other day, I don't mind either way. There are only 7 chapters. Thanks again.x**

**The same disclaimer applies as before. I own nothing except the mistakes, and there are bound to be some lurking about.**

"Quick you guys, cut him off from the other end." Beckett shouted from the platform, pointing in the direction that she wanted Ryan and Esposito to head.

Castle was quickly on her coat tails. He was being careful to stay out of the direct line of fire, so to speak. He loved this part; the adrenalin rush was like nothing else he'd ever experienced. This part never got old, scary some times, but never old.

They had been chasing the perp down the platform at Pen Station for the last five minutes. What turned out to be a simple burglary had gone horribly wrong. The owner had unexpectedly returned from out of town and wound up with a knife in his belly and subsequently on Lanie's table.

They'd caught a break when he tried to fence some of the goods to an undercover cop. He'd made a run for it and was currently trying to dodge NYPD's finest through one of the busiest train stations.

"Move, move." Beckett commanded, as she bobbed her way through the crowd. "Come on Castle, keep up." She turned quickly to glance over her shoulder to find Castle huffing and puffing trying to keep up with her. She couldn't help but laugh at her partner as he tried to pick up the pace.

He was like a whippet. Weaving and darting in and out of the crowd. The distance between the cops and him was now getting greater. It wasn't that Beckett couldn't keep up; he was just so damned fast and small. Although she'd healed from the shooting, she still wasn't back to complete fitness yet. Every day she grew stronger and more determined.

"He's heading for the Amtrak train." Esposito yelled over in Beckett's direction.

Ryan and Esposito picked up their heels and ran faster, trying to get to him before he reached the train. It seemed that _Stop, NYPD_ didn't have the same effect as it used to. He continued running and the passing travellers barely disbursed enough to give them a clean run at him.

"No, No." bellowed Beckett. She watched as he jumped in front of some passengers, squeezing his way onto the train. She ran parallel with it, watching through the panes of glass as he made his way through the carriages.

"Quick, this way." Castle instructed as he pulled on her arm. A swift hop and he and Beckett were now on the inside of the train, chasing after him.

"Stay behind me Castle." Beckett insisted, her gun now drawn, "Castle, do you hear me?" she asked him.

Castle was in fact right behind her. So much so that her behind was all he could see. The way those tight jeans accentuated every curve of her was going to be his undoing.

"Huh? Yes, I'm right here." He replied, inching closer to her.

Her eyes were busily scanning the seats and open sleeping compartments as eager patrons got comfortable. There were far too many people to be able to get a positive id as to his whereabouts now.

"Damn it." Beckett groaned out in frustration, "Where the hell is he?"

As they continued to walk through the train, an announcement came over the PA system that the train would be departing momentarily.

"Castle, we have to get off this thing." she instructed, now pushing her way towards the first available door.

"There he is, over in the next carriage." Castle detected, thrusting Beckett forward.

They both ran the last remaining distance to the automatic door, only to see him jump through it at the last second. He had a smug grin on his face as the doors closed and locked behind him.

Both Beckett and Castle tried frantically to open the door as they felt the train moving.

"Beckett, we're moving." Castle noted, giving her a wide eyed look.

"Good observation skills there Sherlock." She replied sarcastically. She did not want to be stuck on a train going god knows where.

That smug grin was soon washed off the perp's face as Esposito grabbed him from behind and slapped the cuffs on him. "Where the hell do ya think you were going, huh?" he asked, tightening the cuffs to an uncomfortable position.

With his hand placed on his back, he etched him forward to the waiting uniforms. They could transport him back to the precinct and start the booking procedure.

"Where did Beckett and Castle go?" Ryan asked, looking over to his partner puzzled.

"What the hell bro!" Esposito exclaimed. His arms were outstretched in front of him, giving Ryan a look of _I don't believe it_ as both of them saw Castle and Beckett disappear along with the train out of the station.

"What do we do now?" Castle asked, staring at a frustrated Beckett. Her hands were still on the glass of the door, banging it as if it was magically going to open again.

Beckett stood there and ran her hands through her hair. She was sweeping her head from side to side, trying to think of what her next move should be.

"Beckett?" Castle asked again.

"Shut up Castle, I'm thinking here." She snapped at him. "I'm trying to get us out of this mess you seem to have gotten us into."

"Me?" he asked surprised, "You think this is my fault?" he questioned.

Beckett stopped scrutinizing her surroundings and looked at him. "Well, you're the one who pulled _us_ on this damned train Castle." She pointed out to him.

"True," he conceded, "But only because the bad guy did the same. I had no idea this thing was about to depart. From what I could see, the boys arrested him and surely that is all that matters?" he asked.

"Of course it is," she puffed out, "but being stuck in this thing was not part of the job description, ya know?" Her voice was a little softer now. She knew Castle meant well and if she was totally honest with herself, it was actually quick thinking on his part to hop the train as the last minute.

"Well, we will just have to get off at the next stop. Right?" Castle enquired.

"I have to find someone to talk to, see if they can get us off this train."

Beckett continued to look in both directions again as she began walking. "I have to find someone." She repeated to herself.

"Kate." Castle called out, watching as she started to walk away from him.

"What Castle?" she replied, firing her head in his direction.

"How bad can it be? We wait a few hours and before you know it, we'll be back at the precinct."

Beckett shot him look that said he'd better be right or there'd be trouble. Like the good faithful lap dog he was, Castle immediately stepped beside his master and followed her.

It wasn't long until Beckett found a young conductor. He was currently helping a family into their compartment. She waited until he was finished before approaching him.

"Can I help you Ma'am, Sir." He asked politely, looking at them both smiling.

"Detective Beckett NYPD." She announced firmly, her badge almost sticking in his face.

The young man had a look of concern on his face now, the smile long gone. "Is there something wrong?" he asked.

"Yes, yes there is." Castle confirmed.

Brian the employee listened captivated as Beckett relayed the turn of events that lead them to be here at this moment.

"So you see," Beckett began, "We really need to get off this train now. Where is the next stop?" She enquired.

"Normally it stops in Chicago, but seeing as there are no passengers getting off or on there; the next stop is the final destination." He answered.

"And that would be where exactly? Beckett pressed.

"Los Angeles."

"What!" Both Castle and Beckett answered him the same time as they looked at each other.

Castle sucked in his breath and pressed his lips together, trying to stop the laugh that was threatening to escape.

"How bad can it be?" Beckett repeated his earlier question back at him, "Oh pretty bad Castle, pretty bad." She answered herself.

**Well there ya go, first chapter up. Thoughts, would you like to see more?**


	2. Chapter 2

"Los Angeles Castle, Los Angeles." Beckett shouted at him.

"I know, I was here when he told us." He replied flippantly, "Will you please stop shouting, people are staring." Castle turned around and smiled apologetically at the people who where now gawking at them courtesy of Beckett's outburst.

Beckett moved to the side and braced herself against the side of the wall. She couldn't be in LA, too many memories there for her. Memories that she had tucked away in the back of her mind, she wasn't ready for them to come to the forefront. That meant dealing with them, the good and the bad ones.

"I need a drink." She said, walking towards the dining area.

"It won't be so bad Beckett. We get to LA and then we hop straight back on a plane, no big deal." Castle was actually enjoying this. He couldn't understand why Beckett was so uptight. Was it the thought of spending the night with him? Surely not! They had spent all night together before in the name of a case. This would just be like that, wouldn't it?

"I have to call the precinct, tell them what's happening." She said turning to face Castle. "You should probably call home too; let them know you won't be home tonight."

"What?" Castle asked. He was so caught up at the thought of spending a night with her that it never occurred to him that he would have to call home.

"Home - You know, the place where you live." She retorted back. "I'm sure they will be wondering what's happened to you when you don't show up tonight."

Beckett made her way out of earshot of Castle. She pulled out her iphone and called the station. As she turned around, she noticed that he did the same.

He wasn't on the phone long, just long enough to tell Alexis what had happened and that he would be back sometime tomorrow. Beckett also saw him smiling and watched as she lip read him telling Alexis that he loved her too. She also caught the words _don't worry, I won't_. She wondered what he was referring to.

After explaining to the new Captain was had happened, she was instructed to purchase two tickets back home. She would be reimbursed upon her return. It wasn't the money she was worried about. It was giving the Captain more ammunition against Castle, which she didn't want. She could tell by her voice that she was pissed at what happened, even after Ryan and Esposito fought her case.

She hung up and ordered that drink she desperately needed. She held up her glass to Castle and he nodded back to her as he made his way over to join her. Beckett ordered another one and took a seat.

"How did it go?" she asked him as he sat down opposite her.

"Fine." He replied, "Alexis told me to keep out of trouble." He smiled back to her. "What about you, everything all right your end?"

"The Captain was less than thrilled at the situation. Not much we can do about it now though. We are officially off duty until we return to the precinct." She downed the last remaining drops of her drink.

It didn't go unnoticed to Castle that something was bothering her. Was it just the Captain? He did like the way she said _we_ in that last statement. Things had been ever so slightly strained between them after the shooting. He was still the same teasing Castle but Beckett, Beckett was more hesitant towards him and that was something he desperately wanted to fix. At least she was referring to him as her partner again. That was a start, albeit a slow one.

Castle was about to ask her if she was alright when they noticed Brian walk towards them. He held out a key as Beckett took it. "I've been instructed to show you to your sleeping compartment for the night, courtesy of the Management." Brian told them.

They both followed him down the narrow passageway. He stopped abruptly at door number 7, causing Beckett to do the same. Castle wasn't paying attention and the sudden go-slow caused him to career right into the back of Beckett.

"Castle!" she exclaimed, her face twisted in annoyance.

"Sorry." He replied, both his hands facing her palms up, offering her his sincerest apology.

Brian held out his hand, ushering Beckett to open it. When she did, he started to walk away. "Excuse me Brian," Castle began, "This the only compartment left?" Both their faces fell as they stared at their space for the night. It was barely enough room for one, let alone two adults.

"Yes sir," he confirmed, "We are fully booked."

"I could pay for an upgrade you know, money is no issue." Castle tried.

"I'm sorry Sir, but there is nothing to upgrade to. All other sleeping compartments are sold out, even the deluxe ones. There are a few single seats available further down the train if you wish. My superior just thought you would be more comfortable in here."

"Thank you," Beckett spoke, "This will be fine Brian. The NYPD is grateful for your co-operation and kindness." She watched the young man smile as he walked away from her and then disappeared. "I guess money and fame can't buy you everything eh Castle?" she joked towards him.

"No, I guess not." He mumbled out as they entered.

The room was indeed small, comfortable but small. The few paces Beckett strolled forward to, took her to the window of the compartment. At least it had a window. The seating pulled down to make a bed big enough for one. This was noticed by both of them. No doubt there would be a fight at some stage as to what the sleeping arrangements where going to be.

Right in front of the seating/bed area was a built in sink. It was situated round dark mahogany. A small toilet area off the corner of the sink was all that remained in that tight space. At least they had a place to freshen up in the morning.

"I'm sorry Kate." Castle said as he watched her fidget with her fingers. "If I hadn't been so stupid as to drag us on here, you wouldn't be stuck here … with me."

"Castle, it's not like you did it on purpose. Let's just deal with it okay?" Kate sat down in the only chair to occupy the room. She stared out the window absentmindedly.

Castle sat opposite her on the pulled down couch/bed. He leaned forward, his elbows on his knees. "Are you alright?" he tentatively asked her.

"I'm fine Castle." Her tone was sharp. Castle knew better than to pursue this conversation. The fact that she didn't even look at him when she answered made his heart ache.

In the time leading up to the shooting, things between them had been going great. She was being flirtier, more open to having personal conversations with him. More open to spending time with him. How he wished he could go back to those times. In the blink of an eye, or a squeeze of a finger, things had changed so dramatically. Gone were those conversations, unless they were work related. Castle felt like their connection was broken and no matter how hard he tried to piece it back together again, she didn't seem so interested. So this was the new them, sticking to small talk and safe topics.

"Do you like trains Kate?" Castle asked her.

"What?" she answered, her head still fixed on the outside.

"I love trains." He started. "After Alexis was born and Meredith, well after she left," his voice trailed off as he dipped his head slightly, "I used to take Alexis with me on some of my book tours."

He sat back in the seat and watched to see if he could get a reaction from her. It brought a smile to his face when she looked away from the window and stared at him.

"She likes trains huh?" she asked. After everything that they'd been through, she never got tired of hearing stories of Castle and Alexis. She loved his dedication to his daughter; it was one of the things she loved about him. The way he would light up when he recalled stories about them, made her light up inside too.

"She was fascinated at how big they were and used to question me endlessly on how they stayed on the track." He continued. "She used to stare out the window, much like you were doing just now and watch. It made me laugh to hear her say that the wires on the telephone poles outside danced up and down as the train raced passed them."

Kate smiled softly at the description. "It's kind of peaceful ya know, just watching the world pass you by." She did like this. She could sit here and pretend that there was nothing wrong.

"Yes it is." Castle agreed. "I would sit with her on my lap and we would just watch for hours. There was no place I would rather be. She would snuggle into me and I would ask her if she could feel the rhythm of the rails."

"The what?" Kate asked in confusion, now looking at him inquisitively.

"Listen." Castle instructed, "Can you hear it, can you feel it?"

"All I hear is you Castle. Did that scotch go straight to your head?" she teased.

"Come here." He instructed her, holding out his hand for her to take.

Beckett didn't move.

"Come on." He asked again, "I won't bite."

She warily moved from the seat and sat beside him, opting not to take his hand. Castle scooted closer to her. "Close your eyes." He asked.

"What?"

"Indulge me, just for a second."

Beckett closed her eyes, not before shooting a warning signal across his way. He ignored it as he carefully placed his arms over her shoulders. She felt tense and it took all this strength not to work those knots out right there and then.

"Castle." She warned him.

"Shhh," he whispered. "Just relax and listen and you'll feel it."

Relax, she was anything but relaxed. The feel of his hands on her was like cat nip and she could almost hear herself purring under his touch.

"I would hold Alexis like this," he began, holding her tighter now. "I would tell her to close her eyes and let herself feel the train underneath her. Do you feel it now, the rhythm of the rails?" He asked again.

Kate wasn't sure what she felt. She could feel his breath dance across the top of her neck as he spoke. All she knew was that her heart was pounding. Never mind the rhythm of the rails; it was the rhythm of her heartbeat she could feel. Any louder and he would be hearing it too.

They sat like that what for seemed to be the longest time. Castle felt her starting to loosen up under his touch. He moved further back into the seat, taking her with him. He wasn't going to do anything inappropriate to spoil this moment; it had taken too long to get here. He just held her and she let him. That was good enough…for now.

**Apologies for not updating last night. My connection and I were at odds. Thank you to everyone who left a review, it means a lot. Thoughts on chapter two? **


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N I would like to say something to all that have taken the time to read and review this. It's been pointed out to me that I should've done more research before I took them on this train journey. The time line and lack of detail making it kinda unbelievable and just not possible, so for this I apologise. If this spoils your enjoyment and you do not wish to continue reading this, then I fully understand. If this wasn't already written then I would go back and correct it, but to be honest, I don't have the time to do that. If you're willing to forgive my mistake and can look past the time line and want to continue reading, then I thank you.**

* * *

><p>Kate was so relaxed that she'd almost forgotten where she was and whom she was with. She had no idea how long they had been sitting there in each others arms. It had been quite some time since she'd let anyone embrace her like that, not since Josh had left. She had to admit that it felt good, he felt good.<p>

When she opened her eyes, she was surprised to find that it was dark outside. The small light above the window provided only a modicum of brightness, enough to illuminate the room giving it a sultry feel.

Beckett coughed awkwardly as she removed herself from Castle's embrace. His eyes tore open immediately at the loss of contact.

"Sorry." He offered, "I must've dozed off. Trains kinda do that to me." He explained.

He was expecting to be chastised by her, so was pleasantly surprised when she replied. "It's okay Castle, I think I kinda dozed off too. I see what you mean, it's very relaxing."

Castle's stomach let out an almighty growl. "I think I might need food." He observed, looking down at his stomach.

"Yeah, I'm kinda hungry myself." She admitted back to him.

Stretching as she stood up, she made her way over to the small sink. She ran the cold water through her hands and then proceeded to run them through her hair. She didn't have a brush, so this would have to do.

"You ready?" she asked him.

"After you Detective."

Castle couldn't stop the grin that spread across his face. This felt like old times. Technically they weren't going out to dinner like they used to, but they were going to sit down and have a meal together. This would be the first time for that too and he was very much hoping it wouldn't be the last.

The dining area was small and intimate. People were busily eating and chatting away. They made their way to an empty table and Castle pulled out a chair for Beckett. She sat down with a slight blush to her cheek, looking up at him as he pushed the chair back in under the table.

"Thank you." She said. His stare was piercing as he affectionately smiled back at her.

"You're welcome Detective." He replied. He watched her with interest as she nervously tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. He was beginning to notice that this was one of her tell tale signs. He'd been unfortunate enough to witness this before. It was refreshing to be on the winning side this time.

"So." He said to her, still watching her.

"Listen Castle, I …" Kate didn't get time to finish her sentence. A waiter appeared at their table and asked to take their drinks order.

There was a selection of food waiting for them at the buffet style carts at the rear of the carriage. Both got up when the waiter left and they made their way to get some food.

Returning with plates laden with food, they sat back at their table. Castle wasn't quite sure how this was going to go. It had been so long since it was just the two of them eating together. Not that he didn't want that to happen, circumstances had prevented it so far.

He had tried on numerous occasions at the precinct, but with no avail. It seemed that there was always someone around to interrupt. He was actually beginning to think that fate was playing a cruel joke on him. Part of him was starting to believe that Kate was actually relieved to have a third wheel there. She always seemed so tense and the strain was evident on her face.

Castle knew that over the last few months a shift had changed in their relationship and he was more than willing to accept his part in that. She closed herself off from him and he didn't know how to break down those reinforced walls she'd built up again. All he knew was that he would continue to chip away in the hope of them cracking. He understood perfectly why she was feeling this way; it was only natural after all that had happened. Seeing her relaxed sitting opposite him now though, perhaps he was starting to get through. Perhaps some of his guilt could be alleviated.

They both ate their meals and chatted away, nothing heavy of course. To anyone looking at them, they looked just like any normal young couple in love. The laughed and giggled and Castle told silly stories. It was all very stress-free and comfortable.

Kate noticed some people staring at them and whispering.

"I think you may have some fans on this train Castle." She teased him.

Castle turned his head to the side and smiled politely at the people before saying, "Hazard of the job description Beckett."

"Oh it's so hard being you eh Castle?"

"You have no idea," he returned, "Besides; there is only one fan I'm interested in tonight."

"Yeah well, looks like you're stuck with me seeing as I can't go anywhere." She was teasing him now and he knew it.

"I don't think we ever did establish just how big a fan you really are. Did we Detective?" He leaned forward on his elbows towards her.

"Oh Castle, maybe one of these days I let you know." She flung back at him.

"Ahh, so you are admitting finally that you are indeed a fan Detective?"

He had her. She was having so much fun teasing like they used to that she walked straight into that one. They held each others gaze as she smiled, shook her head and rolled her eyes at him. He returned her smile and they continued to chat.

Kate was enjoying herself, she had to admit that. Castle had always been excellent company. She had tried to push him away several times but he was like a bad penny. He just kept on coming back. He knew when she needed comfort, although she was not one for taking it. He also knew when to keep his distance, albeit not too far a distance. Even after that horrible conversation at her apartment when she told him they were over, he came back. He asked no questions and he stood by her side, where be belonged. She was tired of pushing him away, but after everything she wasn't quite sure she was ready yet to take the next step. In fact, she didn't know what that next step should even be. It seemed that guilt was eating away at her too.

"I think I'm going to go back and freshen up." She told him, standing up from the table.

"Will you come back, join me in a night cap?" he asked, his eyes pleading with her.

"Sure Castle." She confirmed and started walking, a nervy feeling starting to appear in her stomach.

Rick smiled as he finished the drink he was currently nursing. Standing up he bumped into an attractive brunette.

"You're that famous author Richard Castle, aren't you?" the fan asked.

"Guilty as charged." He confirmed.

"I don't mean to be rude, but is there any chance of an autograph?" she begged.

"Of course, not a problem." He replied back to her, "I would be no-where if it wasn't for my fans."

The young woman walked backed to her table to fish out a pen as Castle followed her.

Kate splashed some cold water over her face and dried off. Despite the events leading to being here, she was having fun. She fixed her hair as she stared at herself in the mirror. _What are you doing Kate?_ She asked herself. She knew what a dangerous game it would be flirting with Castle.

She knew how he felt about her and although he never did repeat those three words again, they hung round her neck like an albatross. It was almost like she had the devil and angel on opposite shoulders. One was telling her to go with it, the other telling her to be a cautious. She didn't want to hurt Castle but she knew if she took this flirting thing too far, it might just happen. Would she be ready to deal with his crushed feelings… again?

Walking back to the dining area, she heard the unmistakable sound that was Richard Castle's laugh. God, she did love to hear him laugh. Her heart sank when she saw him sitting opposite an attractive woman. They were obviously enjoying themselves.

The woman stopped talking as Kate approached the table.

"Ah detective Beckett, there you are." Castle announced. "Would you care you join us? We were just waiting on…"

Castle didn't get to finish his request. A look of something that could only be described as hurt was written all over Beckett's face.

"So this is the famous Detective Beckett, the muse?" the woman asked. "I've been hearing all about you."

Castle could see that statement annoyed Beckett. In fact, he could see that she was already trying to make her retreat.

"I'm sorry," she started, "I didn't mean to interrupt. I was just going to tell you that I was going to turn in for the night. Excuse me." Kate turned and started walking back to room.

"Beckett," Castle called after her. "Kate." He stood up and made his apologies to the young woman. "I hope your husband likes the autograph." He said to her as he swiftly chased after her.

He reached the door just in time to have it pushed back in his face. "Ouch." He snarled out, pinching his nose. "You want to tell me what the hell that was all about?" he demanded.

"What Castle, did I interrupt as you were about to sign yet another fan's chest?" she snapped at him. "You two looked pretty cosy."

"She was a fan asking for an autograph and for your information; I did ask you to join us." He reminded her.

"What, and have me sit there and watch Miss Suzie Starlet gush all over you, no thanks."

"You sound jealous Detective."

"In your dreams Castle."

"What's this all about Kate? Why are you so mad at me?" he asked her.

"I'm not mad." She replied, "In fact, it's of no concern to me what you do so if you want to go back then feel free." Kate moved towards the window. It was the furthest place that she could go to get away from him.

"After all this time, after all we've been through it always comes back to this. You still think that's who I am, someone who would chase after any piece of skirt?" Castle could feel the anger boiling inside him now.

"If the shoe fits Castle." She stated.

"Actually, the shoe doesn't fit Kate. It hasn't done in a long time, but you would rather it did fit. That way, it gives you the perfect excuse to think the worst of me. If you had joined us like I asked, then you would have met," Castle stopped, looked up at the ceiling and then back to her as he continued, "Miss Suzie Starlet's husband. But no, you see what you want to see and then act all hurt like this is my fault. I've apologised till I'm blue in the face before, but not this time Kate. You can't expect me just to take it?"

Castle walked a few paces towards her, his eyes never leaving her. Her face was filled with so many emotions that he didn't know which one to address first.

"I'm trying Kate. I'm trying so hard to understand what you're going through. You change so quickly from being someone who is happy to have me around and then." He stopped talking, almost hesitant to say the next part for fear of damaging them altogether. "You act out and to be honest, you say awful things to me. You can only push me so far Kate. Unlike you, I'm not made of steel."

Castle hadn't meant for that last part to sound so cold and he could see the comment upset Kate. He waited for the last part to sink in before continuing.

"Listen," he said, his voice a little softer. "There is a spare sleeping chair in the next carriage. I think it's best if I stay there tonight. I'll see you in the morning."

Castle closed the door behind him and Kate sat on the bed. It wasn't long before the tears welled up in her eyes and starting flowing. Tears that she'd held back for so long and for so many things.

She knew he was right, she was being a total bitch to him. She knew in the back of her mind that he would come back, he always did. That's why it had always been safe to push him. Had she pushed him too far this time? Not since Montgomery's death had Kate cried herself to sleep.

Castle pulled the thin white blanket up and over him and tried to settle in the chair. He let out a heavy sigh and closed his eyes. Sleep wasn't going to come easy for him tonight.


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N Thank you so much to all that are sticking with me on this, I really appreciate it. I was concerned by the lack of reviews and thought perhaps you all had enough. So glad some of you want me to continue. **

* * *

><p>Castle had been awake from quite some time. He watched as the morning rush of people grabbed breakfast, getting ready for the next leg of their journey.<p>

How on earth anyone could sleep comfortably in one of those so called sleeping chairs was beyond him. Every part of his body ached, his heart especially.

Fights between them were not uncommon, but it didn't make it any easier to deal with. He hated fighting with her, hated the feeling it left him with. Even the times where it wasn't his fault he would find himself reaching out first to say sorry. This usually proceeded with her saying the same. They would crack a small joke and everything would go back to 'normal', whatever that was these days. He really would do anything to put that beautiful smile back on her face.

All through the night, his thoughts returned to that fight. So here he was now, trying to talk himself out of taking the blame for her being so unreasonable. She was the most frustrating person he had ever met. She was also the most extraordinary and the only one never to be impressed by his notoriety. The fame and money part held no interest to her; she had made that clear so many times before. It left him now wondering what the hell she was interested in. At times he thought he knew her so well and now, now he was as confused as ever. The only thing that was crystal clear to him was that he was deeply in love with this woman.

Kate studied herself in the small mirror above the sink. Her eyes were puffy and quite frankly, she looked a mess. How on earth was she going to cover this up with no fresh make-up to apply?

She had tossed and turned all night, feeling guilty over their argument. She didn't blame Castle, he was right as usual. She wanted to talk about it, and yet at the same time she didn't. Her therapist had told her that talking through the things that scared us the most makes them easier to deal with. The only thing being, she wasn't sure she was really ready to deal with it, to deal with her feelings for him. Sure she'd dated other men, but Castle was the only one she'd been in love with. Taking a step back seemed like the easier option, the safer option.

Kate heard a soft knock on the door followed by Castle whispering, "Beckett, are you awake?"

She reached out and opened the door to find him standing there, dishevelled holding a tray. "I thought you might like some breakfast," he offered her, handing her a selection of fruit, croissants and coffee.

Even now he was being terribly sweet and his compassion and thoughtfulness never ceased to amaze her.

"Thank you." She replied, taking the tray from him. She walked over to the small table next to the armchair and sat down.

Castle could see the tension on her face. "I seriously need to pee." He announced, "Excuse me." He made his way to the small toilet.

Beckett picked at her food as Castle freshened up. She was so lost in her own thoughts and didn't notice that he was standing watching her.

"Penny for them?" Castle asked.

"What Castle, huh?" she replied, now looking at him.

"I'm just wondering what is going through that pretty head of yours." He enquired.

"What is going through my head is that I'm dying to get off this train, catch a plane and sleep in my own bed." Her reply was noncommittal.

The sudden halt of the train altered them to the fact that the train had now stopped. Pushing the tray back on the table, she got up and brushed passed him.

"I guess we're not going to talk about this then?" he asked.

"Castle, can we please not do this now?" she begged.

Kate continued to walk through the carriages. She knew she was being unreasonable but there was no way she was having this conversation here and now.

The warm air of LA hit them as soon as they stepped on to the platform. The sky was a gorgeous shade of blue and there was not a cloud to be seen.

Castle took off his jacket and slung it over his shoulder as he watched Beckett move through the crowd. He sighed heavily and followed her out of the station.

She hailed a cab and turned around to see where he was. "You coming Castle?" she asked as she stepped into the cab.

Castle sat beside her and closed the cab door. "The airport please." Beckett instructed the driver.

The window was slightly open, causing a gentle breeze to blow through her hair. Castle watched her as an annoying strand tickled the side of her face. She blew to the side, trying to move it.

"Here, let me." Castle offered, taking the small strand and gently putting it behind her ear.

Kate turned to face him and he could still see the conflict in her eyes. Something was haunting her.

He returned his hand to his side, let out a small sigh and softly smiled at her.

"This warm air certainly beats the cold chill in New York." He commented. "I could get used to this again."

It wasn't just the chill of New York; she was giving off a slight chill herself towards Castle. Surely she could not still be mad at him? Beckett laid her head on the back of the cab seat and turned away from him. She watched from the window, immersed in her own thoughts.

She tried not to think about LA much, not since Royce's death. It was just too painful. Now she was here though and the image of her former training officer wouldn't leave her mind. Every since she knew that this was where the train was headed, her thoughts had been elsewhere. This had been one of the reasons she had been so snappy with Castle.

She thought Castle would've realised this, he notices everything else after all. But since he hadn't mentioned anything to her specifically, she wasn't going to bring it up. She knew he would only want to talk about it. She also knew in his own way that he would want to help her, he always does. Her head felt like a racing track, so many things going round and round. She was worried that if she didn't deal with them at some stage, there was going to be one almighty crash.

The remainder of the ride was done is silence. Castle was actually sitting there biting his lip, the urge to say something was quite overwhelming. He wasn't usually one to hold back, but something sad in her eyes told him it would be a bad idea. The last thing he wanted to do was cause her more pain, he could see that she was in enough already.

Castle pulled some money from his wallet and paid the driver. They made their way inside the airport and over to the desk to purchase tickets home.

The information the clerk behind the desk gave did not go down well with Beckett.

"What, you're seriously telling me that the first flight back to New York isn't until later on this afternoon?" She grunted in frustration. "What about standby?" she asked.

"Sorry Ma'am, there is nothing available. Would you like to purchase two tickets for the later flight?" she asked.

Beckett handed over her card as she processed the details. She turned to Castle and said, "I'm going to have to speak to someone in security, tell them I have a weapon. You can just wait for me by the seats if you want?"

Castle trotted off and shouted over his shoulder, "I'll be over there, at that store," pointing in the direction in which to find him.

"Fine, I'll see you there." She confirmed.

Castle disappeared to another stand first before making his way over to the nearby shop. He pottered around and then purchased a few items. He really couldn't go into any shop without buying something.

When Beckett joined him, he handed her a small plastic bag and said, "I have an idea." He looked at her with a silly grin on his face.

"Oh, why do I get the feeling I'm not going to like this Castle?"

"Just hear me out." He pleaded, with matching puppy dog eyes.

"Do I have a choice?" she answered back, a small smile escaping her lips.

"Well, since we are going to be here for the morning and some of the afternoon, what would you say to freshening up first and then spending the morning down town, perhaps a walk along the beach?"

"This isn't a day trip Castle, we could just wait here. You know the airport, where normal people wait for flights." She was still holding the small plastic bag that Castle had given her.

"Aww, c'mon Beckett. I've been cooped up in that train all night. I really want to stretch my legs. Just for a little while, please?" he almost sang out that last word as she chewed on her bottom lip.

Beckett shook her head at him; he really was like a big kid sometimes.

"Okay, here's what we'll do first," He started, almost skipping towards her, "I'm going to get us a room at the hotel by the airport."

"Like hell you are Castle. Was stretching your legs only confined to the nearest hotel room?"

"Why Detective, your insinuations wound me." He mocked, holding his hand over his chest. "I thought we could freshen up in there. Take a shower and feel revitalised. Look in the bag, I bought you some necessities."

Beckett finally opened the plastic bag to find an assortment of travel toiletries. She was almost glad to see a toothbrush and some toothpaste. She hated the feeling of not brushing her teeth.

"That's very sweet of you Castle, thank you. But I can always just use the bathroom to freshen up, it's free after all and I don't think the Captain would be too thrilled if I threw in an expense for a hotel room."

"What, worried there might be speculation that you couldn't keep your hands to yourself Detective?"

"Yeah right Castle, keep dreaming. The only way my hands are going to be on you is when I throttle you." She countered. "You seriously want to spend all that money just so you can take a shower?"

"Well I do have this extravagant lifestyle to maintain…apparently." He looked at her raising his eyebrow.

"Fine Castle, let's just do this. I'm too tired to argue."

Castle fished something out of his pocket and made his way out of the airport, Beckett behind him for a change.

When they reached the rental department, he pressed the object in his hand and the bleep alerted him to where the rental car was waiting.

"I took the liberty of renting us this for our little road trip." Castle said, now opening the door for Beckett to get in.

He quickly walked round to the other side and climbed in and started the engine.

"What, no Ferrari this time Castle?" she asked.

If was like he'd been slapped in the face as it finally dawned on him why she didn't want to be here. He mentally kicked himself for being so stupid, he should've realised before now.

"Sadly, this was the best they had." He replied. He wasn't going to say anything just yet. He needed to handle this one with kid gloves. As much of a kid as he was at times, this called for a more mature approach.

He drove the short distance to the hotel airport and parked. Making their way to the hotel door, Beckett slowed her pace.

"Castle, this really isn't a good idea." She reiterated.


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N This chapter is for stanafan, since you asked so nicely for . To answer lunotto's question, No, it's just some random hotel by the airport. I received more story alerts on this, so I guess it can't be that bad. Thank you all taking the time to read and review, you're awesome. Hugs.x**

* * *

><p>The woman behind the desk gave them a look. She heard stories often and it was not in her job description to judge. Working in the service industry, she was used to 'clients' who rented rooms by the hour.<p>

"Did you see her face?" Castle laughed to Beckett. "She must think that we are here for some illicit tryst."

"Do you really expect her to think any different when you rent a room only for the afternoon?"

Castle swiped the door and entered the room. He walked over to the bed and flopped down on it. "Ahh, that feels so much better. That so called sleeping chair was so uncomfortable." He stretched out as his back clicked into place. "You wanna take the bathroom first?" he offered.

"Thanks Castle." She said, taking her small bag with her.

He watched as Beckett disappeared into the bathroom. It wasn't long until he heard the shower running. Oh, how he was so looking forward to just standing under the hot water and letting it penetrate his aching muscles.

He closed his eyes for moment and placed one arm under his head. He could feel himself starting to doze off.

A short time later, Kate emerged from the bathroom. It felt so good to stand under the shower, she badly needed that. She noticed that Castle was sleeping peacefully and she didn't have the heart to wake him up. She felt a twinge of guilt hearing him say how uncomfortable his night had been. If the bags under his eyes were anything to go by, it looked like he gotten as much sleep as she had last night.

She sat tentatively on the end of bed, careful not to rouse him. With a towel in her hand, she softly began to take the water out of her hair. She couldn't take her eyes off him. The way he looked as he slept was so captivating. His nose twitched slightly and she almost reached out to stroke his face.

He must've sensed that she was there as his eyes shot open.

"Hey." He said softly, "Enjoy your shower?"

"Hey," she answered back, "Yeah, it was just what I needed. It's all yours now. I didn't mean to waken you, you looked so peaceful just now."

"It's okay, I was just resting my eyes until you were finished." He hopped off the bed and made his way to the bathroom.

Kate finished off getting ready as Castle showered. She laughed to herself as she could hear him humming something in the shower. The simplest of pleasures really did amuse him.

When he materialized from the shower, Beckett was ready. "I see what you mean," Castle agreed, "I could've stayed under there for hours."

He walked over beside her and picked up his jacket from the bed. She didn't move from the end of it.

"I know I kinda bulldozed you into this. If you really don't want to do anything, we can go back to the airport. I don't mind." He offered sincerely. "Or we could just hang out here; take a nap for a few hours?"

She looked at him and then back down to the bed. It was large and inviting. Like the creepy sixth sense he had, he knew what she was thinking.

"You wanna take a quick nap, don't you?" he asked her.

"Am I that obvious?" she replied as tiredness waved over her.

"Listen," Castle spoke, "Why don't you get some sleep for a while. I'll take a stroll outside and leave you in peace. I won't bug you, promise." He said, making a Boy Scout sign.

"If I remember correctly, you never were a Boy Scout." She looked at him her eyebrows cocked in disbelief. "Besides, I thought you might want to take a quick nap too, you still look pretty tired yourself."

"Is that your way of asking me to go to bed with you Beckett?" he taunted.

"No Castle. That was me asking if you would like to share a bed. Big difference." She plainly stated, grateful that their banter was returning.

Beckett had already moved and was now sitting upright on one side of the bed. She took off her shoes and scooted right over, leaving him the other side. She let out a small yawn and got comfortable.

Rick stood watching her. Not one of his creepy stares this time. He was mesmerized by this woman. She could even make the most mundane of tasks like lying on a bed so sexy. The truth was that he would like nothing better than to crawl into bed with her, albeit under different circumstances.

"Castle, stop staring and lay down will ya?" Beckett ordered. She had her back to him now but she could still feel his eyes on her.

She felt the bed dip slightly as Castle's weight filled the mattress. It must've been slightly worn in the middle. The combination of his weight on one side and hers in the middle caused them both to roll into each other accidentally.

Neither of them moved from their new positions. He lay there stiff as a board, almost scared to move in case he brushed against her. Her back was against his side now and he could feel the heat from her body. She gently snuggled backwards so that she made further contact and he inhaled deeply. She just needed to feel him close to her.

Kate's eyes were shut. She really was exhausted as the emotional events of last night took their toll. She was trying hard not to think of Royce and the facts he made in his last letter to her. How those words haunted her. Would she be able to finally admit to Castle that she felt the same? More importantly, would she have the courage to do anything about it?

Castle could feel Kate's breathing even out as she fell asleep. He at long last let out a breath that for some reason he felt necessary to hold and relaxed. He moved his head to the side and Beckett's hair tickled his nose. He inhaled deeply, trying to take in her scent. Not the usual aroma, but none the less it was still Beckett. He inched ever so closer, struggling to keep the promise to himself of not taking things further.

He closed his eyes as he cautiously buried his face into her hair and the back of her neck, nuzzling in as much as he could without wakening her.

Kate let out a sigh and turned around, her face now right up against his. He could feel her breath on his face. This was close enough to be painful. He forced his eyes open and found the emerald gems staring back at him. He stared her with interest as she slowly moistened her lips and he swallowed hard.

He didn't flinch, instead he just held her gaze. This was another one of those occasions where they had a conversation without actually saying anything. Castle was getting mixed signals. There was so much he wanted to say to her, needed to say to her. He knew she would run though, it was what she did after all when things got too heavy.

He was surprised when Kate didn't break eye contact with him. She had always done that in the past. What was going through that mind of hers he wondered?

"Having trouble sleeping Castle?" she asked.

"I … yeah, I guess so. You?" he asked in return.

"I just can't seem to settle, ya know? Her voice was soft as she continued the eye contact with him.

"Come here," he offered, holding out his arm for her to lean into.

"Castle, I don't think…" she shook her head as she fought with her emotions.

"This is purely for soothing purposes, I promise. No funny stuff. Come on." He offered again.

Kate moved down the bed slightly and rested her head on his chest as his arm snaked around her. Her arm automatically found a home on his chest as she unconsciously rubbed her thumb over his shirt.

"Castle?" she said, not moving from her position.

"Hmm." He answered as he tenderly made circles on the small of her back.

"Thank you for this and for not, well not for pushing, ya know?"

"Always." He replied as he tightened his hold on her.

That word had come to mean so much to the both of them. A silent commitment, an understanding of sorts to always be there for each other, no matter what.

It was so comfortable and felt so natural just to be lying there in each others arms. He wished that it was for longer than just the few hours. They would have to get back to the real world at some stage.

Castle woke up some hours later. He could still feel the warmth of Kate in his arms and was glad that she hadn't broken their contact. He opened his eyes and looked down at her. She hadn't moved a muscle. Her arm was still on his chest where it had been before she'd fallen asleep. His grin was so wide it almost made his face ache.

He could've stayed like that forever. He moved his hand up so it was nestling in her hair and he gently massaged her head. "Kate." He whispered out.

She didn't move, just buried her head tighter in against his shoulder.

"Kate." He tried again, this time pressing harder with his fingers.

"Hmm, what Castle?" she replied lazily.

"We should really think about getting up. That's if you still want to go for a walk before we fly home?"

"Yeah, I guess we should since you already hired that car." She finally moved her head from its comfortable position to look at him.

Castle let out a small giggle upon seeing her face.

"What's so funny?" she asked him, baffled as to why he seemed to be laughing at her.

"Nothing really. It's just that you have the cutest wrinkle on your face. Must've been the way you were positioned." He reached his hand up to stroke the crease with his thumb, as if he was trying to iron it out.

He felt her breathing hitch when he made contact. He looked deeply into her eyes, searching for some kind of acknowledgement that this was acceptable. She smiled affectionately at him as he continued to stroke her face.

Kate moved her hand from his chest. Slowly and painfully she dragged it up to the side of his face. Mirroring his actions, she began to caress his ear lobe with her thumb.

Their faces mere inches apart now. The pull they had towards each other was like nothing neither one of them had ever felt before. Lightning seemed to be going off inside both of them as they continued to touch each others face. If nothing else happened, then this would be a massive step forward in their relationship.

Castle wanted so much to kiss her right now. The urge just to close that final distance was excruciating. Watching her lick her lips once again was almost his undoing as he felt the twinges of passion stirring in him. Did she have any idea what that simplest of touch was doing to him?

Kate was surprised at herself. She hadn't planned on this, planned on giving in to her feelings so easily. She was such an emotional mess. It was so easy to be with him though. He never made it about him, always about making sure she was happy. She was enjoying his touch. The feel of his masculine hand on her face was giving her butterflies. He had such a gentle touch for such a large man. Her thoughts betrayed her as she momentarily drifted off and wandered how she would feel to have him touch her elsewhere.

Castle knew he had to move. Her contact was starting to have an embarrassing effect on him. If she pulled herself any tighter to him, the game would almost certainly be over. He decided to kill it there and then. He moved in quickly and placed a kiss on her forehead.

"Come on." He said, "We should make tracks." He removed himself from her and walked towards the door, hiding his reason for doing so. He also missed the confused and hurt expression on Kate's face.


	6. Chapter 6

The ride to the nearest beach was done in silence. Castle parked the car and walked over to open the door for Beckett.

"Its fine Castle, I got it." She told him rather gruffly. She slammed the car door shut and started walking away from him.

"Hey...What did the car door ever do to you?" he asked her.

"Can we just do this already and then get back to the airport?"

"Wow, wait a minute," he replied. "Did I do something wrong? Did I miss something in between us waking up and being happy to this? Whatever this is." He wanted to know. "Please Kate, talk to me?"

He followed her as she strolled along the boardwalk. She was still saying nothing. She nervously removed her hands from her jean pockets and wiped them on her thighs.

"Where are we going?" he asked her.

"Does it matter?" She continued to walk, taking in some steps down onto the beach. When her feet hit the sand she stopped. She took off her shoes and let her toes wiggle through the sand. It was hot against her feet. She bent down to pick up her shoes and carried on walking.

Castle jogged to keep up with her as his feet found it hard to maintain their balance under the small golden grains.

When he caught up to her, she had stopped again. This time she sat down on the sand and stared out at the ocean. The way the sunlight hit the water gave it a magical feel as the water seemed to shimmer.

"You wanna dip your toes in?" he asked as he sat down beside her.

"It does look inviting but no thanks. I hate that feeling of wet sand stuck to my feet with nothing to dry them off with."

"Yeah, those grainy little bastards do get into the most annoying places." He replied.

Beckett let out a small chuckle as she asked, "Is that personal experience talking there Castle? Spent many encounters trying out that theory have we?"

"Actually no Detective, I was simply agreeing on how annoying it is to get sand stuck in between your toes. What exactly did you think I was referring to?" he teased.

She didn't answer him. Instead she pulled her knees up to her chest and hugged herself. With her head on her knees, she turned to face him.

"I've kinda been all over the place," she confessed, "I'm sorry Castle. I didn't mean to take it out on you."

"I'm sorry too."

"For what?" she wondered, "You've been nothing but terribly sweet and patient with me."

"I finally realised why you were so anxious. When we found out that the train was heading here," He moved closer to sit shoulder to shoulder with her now. "I'm sorry I didn't realise sooner."

She gave him a heartbreaking smile confirming that he was on track with his thinking and placed her head on his arm.

"It's just…Well, the last time I was here." Her voice started to break and she found she couldn't go on.

"I know," Castle said, putting his arm around her in comfort.

"So many memories Castle, I still can't believe I'm never going to see him again. Ya know?"

He knew exactly what she was talking about. It had crossed his mind numerous times what it would feel like to lose her. On more than one occasion they had come extremely close. He knew he would never recover from that.

"I know," he told her again. He took her hand and laced his fingers through hers gently squeezing them.

They sat on the sand and Castle continued to hold her, offering her comfort, nothing else. He was waiting until she was ready again to talk about this. He didn't have to wait long before she spoke.

"I never really let myself grieve for him, ya know?" she admitted, looking up at him.

He could see the ends of her eyes were becoming moist as she fought to hold back the tears. It was breaking his heart to see her in such pain. He had only witnessed her crying twice before. Once when she shot her mother's shooter and then again as Montgomery lay on the airport ground. Granted there had been times when she was upset and close to it. She was a strong woman though and he was glad that she was finally letting him in.

"It's okay to grieve for him Kate, its all part of the healing process. Doesn't mean that you'll ever forget him or what he meant to you."

"I was in love with him ya know." She said back to him, sniffling. "That time when I came off the phone and you asked me if it was all an act, I lied."

Castle had his suspicions about this but he never thought he would hear her acknowledge it.

"I tried to hate him after he betrayed me but I couldn't. A little part of me just died inside. When I found out he'd been shot and killed." She froze as memories of him lying on the ground came back and she couldn't hold back the tears any longer. "I never got the chance to talk to him again. I always thought I would get that opportunity."

Kate continued to lean on his arm as the tears soaked his shirt. He could feel her body jerk slightly every time she spoke. He pulled her in close and let her sob.

"You still can Kate. Just because he isn't here doesn't mean he can't hear you. If there are unresolved things that you need to say," Castle moved his hand to cup the side of her face and continued, "then at a quieter time, close your eyes and talk to him. It will do you good to get it off your chest. You won't get the answers you're looking for, but it will give you some sense of peace, closure if you like."

"When did you get so smart and logical?" she asked him, wiping the last tears from under her eyes.

"I guess you must be rubbing off on me." He laughed and watched her raise her eyebrows, waiting on the innuendo part to come next.

After he felt her relax, he grabbed her hand again and pulled her to her feet. "C'mon, what do you say to making some new memories?" He closed his hand around hers as they began to walk in the sand.

They reached the top of the stairs leading back up to the boardwalk. Their hands remained joined as Castle pulled her towards a stand.

"Fancy a hotdog?" he asked. Before she had time to answer he had already given the man behind the stand his order for two with all the works.

Kate hadn't realised how hungry she was until she had started eating. They leisurely walked in comfortable silence as they ate their dogs.

Coming across a trash can, he deposited the napkins and gestured with her hands to the bench next to them, offering her a seat.

"This view is breath taking." Kate pointed out as she stared at ocean.

"Yes, yes it is." Castle confirmed, his eyes never leaving her.

"I'm glad you told me how you felt about him." Castle admitted, "Back then, I could see the inner struggle you were having. I felt so helpless. All I wanted to do was take away your pain."

"Castle, you helped me more than you ever could've imagined. You asked me how close I came to pulling that trigger." She had now turned to face him.

"I remember." He replied.

"It would've been so easy just to pull that trigger. My finger was on it. I heard you call out my name. You brought me back and honestly, I don't know what would've happened if you hadn't been there Castle."

Castle was touched. To have her admit this was a huge step for her.

"I do," he responded, "Royce wouldn't have wanted you to waste your life, your career for him. You did him proud Kate."

Their eyes met and locked.

It was Kate who made the first move. She reached out and touched his face tenderly, brushing her thumb along his bottom lip. She lightly pulled down on it opening his mouth slightly. Her eyes darkened as she moved in to kiss him. The kiss was soft, tender and filled with so much emotion that it sucked the air from them both.

He responded with equal enthusiasm as his hand found its way to the back of her head. His fingers in her hair, he pulled her in closer as he deepened it. Their tongues meeting for the first time sent bolts of electricity through them both. It was like a well rehearsed dance and they knew exactly how to navigate it.

When he broke their connection, he placed his forehead to hers. He was breathing hard now and he had to restrain himself from kissing her like he really wanted to.

"Kate." He groaned out. "What are we doing?"

"Making new memories Castle." She answered, placing another kiss to his lips. "C'mon, we really should get back to the airport."

They walked hand in hand back to the car and started the drive to the airport.

They were oblivious to everyone else as they took their seats on the plane. This time as Castle leaned his head against the back of the seat, Kate had no trouble cuddling into him. Something she had wanted to do the last time but didn't.

She was returning to New York this time slightly healed. The only thing foremost on her mind now was Captain Gates. She was not looking forward to this. She hadn't told Castle, but she'd received a text message from her saying she was to report back in as soon as she landed. She had a horrible feeling she wasn't going to like what Iron Gates was going to say.

**A/N Thank you all for your continued support and reviews, it means a alot. Hope you're not too disappointed by this chapter? Baby steps.**


	7. Chapter 7

Beckett entered the precinct apprehensively, with Castle behind her. She wasn't sure if Captain Gates would still be there, but she always followed orders. So here she was.

She made way over to her desk and smiled at Ryan and Esposito, who were sitting talking.

"Hey guys." she greeted them.

"Yo boss!" Esposito returned, "How was LA?" He held out his fist as Castle exchanged their usual greeting and bumped them together.

"Any idea what the urgency is?" Beckett enquired.

"Nope," Ryan answered, "We were just about to go home when she told us to wait until you got back."

Beckett looked over to her office and watched as she finished her conversation on the phone.

"What's going on guys, did I miss something?" Castle spoke, looking at all three of them with one eye sweep.

Gates now made her way out of her office and was approaching them.

"Detective Beckett, can I please see you and your team in my office." It wasn't a question, she commanded them.

As Castle followed behind, Gates turned to face him and clarified, "This does not extend to you Mr Castle. This is strictly for NYPD employees, not writer tag a longs."

The words stung as Castle backed away, a look of concern on his face. Gates had made no secret of her disapproval at Castle's presence. He wondered if this was now the end of the road for him.

He made his way over to his chair and sat down. He had a perfect view into Gates' office.

Apart from Gates, nobody sat down. Castle watched as she began talking. It was killing him not being able to hear what was going on. He witnessed Beckett in some sort of confrontation. Her hands when to her hair and then up in the air in protest. _What the hell was going on in that office_ he wondered.

Ryan and Esposito both tried to calm her down but she was riled. Beckett looked out over to Castle and then back to Gates as she continued her objection.

Beckett flung the office door open and stormed out as Castle called after her.

"What the hell happened in there?" he asked the guys as they came back towards him.

"We tried Bro, we really tired." Esposito detailed, "She is really not your biggest fan."

"Tried what?" he asked, but a sinking feeling in his stomach told him he may already know the answer to his own question. "Please guys, what happened in there and where did Beckett go?"

"She's been told to take a few days off." Ryan answered as he rubbed at his chin, "I've never seen her like that before." Both Ryan and Esposito stared at each other.

"Like what? Will one of you please tell me what is going on?" he pleaded.

"Iron Gates tore her a new one." Esposito explained, "She told Beckett that she wanted you out, that you had no place in here pretending to be a cop. That yesterday's little stunt just proved how reckless and dangerous it is to have you here."

"Oh." Castle said, feeling deflated.

"Beckett starting quoting statistics to her, telling her that you not only had the best results in the city, but the state." Esposito continued.

"I guess she wasn't impressed then?" Castle asked.

"Bro, she seriously has the bit in between her teeth. Beckett flew to your defence, telling her that you came as package deal. How you were the best partner she has ever had and if you went then she was no longer interested at working at the twelfth."

"Well that's just crazy." Castle said.

"What went down in LA bro? I've never seen her so determined."

"Nothing really. We just, well we just sorted a few things out, I think. Where did she storm off to?"

"Your guess is as good as mine. I think she just needed to cool off, you know how worked up she can get." Ryan pointed out.

"I have to find her." Castle said.

"Thanks guys." Castle said almost running of the precinct.

He stood outside the entrance and looked in both directions. He was hoping to find her there, cooling off like Ryan had suggested. Nothing, she was no-where to be seen. His next stop was the garage, to see if her car was still there. It wasn't.

"Damn it Kate, where are you?" he spoke out loud in frustration.

He quickly hailed a cab and gave the driver the address to Beckett's apartment. Flinging him way too much money when he arrived, he speedily made his way inside.

Deciding that the elevator was taking far too long, he made his way to the stairs. He panted as he took them two at time.

He reached her door and knocked on it. There was no answer. He pulled out his phone and called her, again no answer. It went straight to voicemail so he left a message for her to call him as soon as she got this message.

There was nothing much else he could do until she made contact, so he decided to head home.

Getting out of the elevator he noticed an object sitting outside his door.

"Beckett," he said, "I've been looking everywhere for you. Why didn't you answer your phone?"

"I just needed some time to think. I started walking and before I knew it, I was here." She stood up as he unlocked the door.

"Why are you sitting outside?" he asked as they made their way inside.

"I did knock, but no-one answered. I guess they're out."

Castle walked over to the fridge where Alexis had left him a note, in case he got home and she wasn't there.

"You're right," he confirmed, "I guess they got sick of waiting for me to get home. Both have made other plans for tonight, looks like I'm all alone." He looked behind him to find her still standing next to the door.

She closed the door behind her and made her way over to him. "It's freezing in here Castle. I thought my apartment was cold." She observed, hugging herself.

"Let me start this fire and then I'll get you something hot to drink."

Castle moved to light the fireplace. It was really only for show as the loft was centrally heated. On harsh New York winters, it added extra warmth to the loft.

Pressing a button, the flames roared and the fire came to life. Beckett stood next to it, rubbing her hands together trying to heat herself up.

Castle made two hot chocolates and came to stand beside her. He put the mugs on the table and moved behind her, encasing her in his embrace.

She didn't stir, just keep staring at the fire.

"The guys told me what happened." He told her, putting his chin on her shoulder.

She carefully leaned back into him closing her eyes.

"Kate," he spoke, now turning himself around to face her, "If I can't be at the precinct anymore, then we'll just work around it. Don't do any silly because of me. You've worked too hard to get to where you are and more importantly, you're the best at what you do."

Kate placed her hands on his chest and looked deeply into his eyes. "Castle, you're the best partner I've ever had. I don't wanna lose that." She moved to the couch and sat on the ground, her back against the front of it.

Castle joined her, his hand supporting his head as he softly spoke, "We both knew it might come to this one day. Frankly, I'm surprised I've lasted this long." He laughed, trying to lighten the mood as she raised her eyebrows in agreement as she recalled Montgomery's words to her on that subject. "Besides, who said anything about you losing me? Just because I can't be there, doesn't mean you won't see me. You won't get rid of me that easy detective."

Kate reached out and took a sip of the hot chocolate that was sitting on the table. Leaving a slight chocolaty moustache, Castle reached over and affectionately wiped it away before licking his finger.

"What exactly did she say to you?" Castle was curious. As much as the guys had told him what had gone down, he wanted to hear it from her.

"Just that you were reckless and one of these days your actions might not turn out so favourably." Kate decided to spare him her actual words, she could be kinder. "Of course she couldn't dispute our record, but she firmly reminded me that you are not a cop and should be leaving the detective work to the real ones."

"Why did she tell you to take a few days off?"

"When I said that I wanted you to stay as my partner, that we were a team, she told me to consider my position very carefully."

"Thank you Kate." They were facing sideways now, locked into each other. "You don't have to do this for me. In fact, I won't let you do this for me."

"Castle, I…"

"No Kate, I mean it. I can fight my own battles. I'll speak to her and if this is how it has to end, then so be it. I won't pretend I won't be devastated, but knowing you are still here for me will be worth it." He creased his forehead at her, asking for clarification. When she smiled at him he continued, "Besides, she can't stop me showing up at the precinct to bring my girlfriend coffee or lunch, or just to see the guys."

"Girlfriend huh, is that what I am?" her reply a little lighter.

"What?" he mocked as his eyes went wide, "How about significant other?" She was now rolling her eyes at him and shaking her head as he went on, "Lover?" His voice deepened as her eyes grew darker, "Wife?" he threw in for good measure.

"Wow Castle, you've gone right through the whole courtship and straight into marriage." Although the idea of spending the rest of her life with him did not scare her as much as she thought it would.

"I just want to get to the honeymoon phase." He teased, a tease that earned him a playful slap to the thigh.

Her hand didn't move from his lap, instead she squeezed it a little tighter and rested it there.

"I like this." He told her.

"What?" she asked.

"This. You being here, us talking. It's nice. I like that you can be honest with me. You know you can tell me anything, right?"

"I know," she confirmed.

Castle's hand snaked along the front of couch seat and he lovingly started to play with the nape of her neck, his fingers gently brushing through her hair.

"Can I show you something?" she asked.

"You can show me anything you like." He replied huskily.

"Behave." She told him as she reached for her purse. Not missing the child like pout he had.

Castle was interested to see what was so important in that purse. It always amazed him to see the amount of stuff women actually kept in there. He watched as she opened a side zip and took out a letter. She fingered it carefully before she handed it to him.

"What's this?" Castle held the letter, not opening it just yet.

"This was the last thing Royce left me. I want you to read it."

"Are you sure? I imagine this to be extremely personal?"

"It is and yes, I'm sure."

Castle carefully unfolded the piece of paper. It was worn and he imagined that Kate had read it over and over again. He began to read it as she watched him. At certain parts he would stop and look at her and she knew what parts those were. She knew that letter off by heart.

His eyes were filled with sadness. He could remember her standing over his body in that alley and Lanie handing her that letter. He now knew the inner struggle she had been going through.

"Wow," he responded, "I don't know what to say Kate."

Kate didn't say, but he could hazard a guess that Royce had been in love with her too. Being her training officer he of course, didn't step over that line.

"Are you still fighting it Kate?"

Kate pursed her lips together and considered her words carefully. "Do you remember the conversation in the hotel room?"

"Of course, I meant every word of it and even to this day, you still amaze me."

Kate blushed and broke eye contact for a fraction of a second.

"They way you looked at me that night. I could feel it ya know, that connection." She shifted her position slightly so she was now kneeling at his side. "I was a coward Castle, I ran from my feelings. Royce was right; I was fighting it all the way." She cleared her throat slightly and went on, "After I left you, I stood behind that bedroom door and …" she stopped talking and took his hands in hers.

"What?" he asked, his look penetrating her.

"I came back out and you were gone. All I could see was the door closing and your shadow from the crack in the door walking away." Her grip tightened on his and he knew what a big admission this was for her.

"What did you think would've happened if I hadn't gone into the bedroom?"

"Truthfully, I don't know. Maybe it was the best thing, ya know? Maybe we had go through all that to get to this."

"And what exactly is this?" Castle had to push now; he had to know where he stood.

"This is me not running. This is me not fighting it anymore. This is me risking my heart."

"You know I would never break it intentionally?"

Damn, he could be so sincere at times that it made her regret not doing this sooner. "You better not. There will a line a mile long to take you out if you do." She smiled at him.

"Speaking of taking out, how would you feel about going out on a date with me? I would like to do this properly." You could see the excitement all over his face.

"There's only one problem with dates Castle." She began to tell him, "It gets to that awkward part of the night when you ask yourself if it's appropriate to kiss said date."

"Uh, I see. Do you have a suggestion to that predicament?" One of his hands had now found its way around her waist and he was pulling her slowly towards him.

She licked her lips slowly, paying special attention to her tongue lingering on her bottom lip. She breathed out, "We could always get that part out of the way just now. Ya know, just so we could actually relax on the date."

"Hmm," he considered, "I can see the logic in that."

His next move was so quick that he almost lifted her off of her knees altogether. He swept her into his arms and kissed her like he had always wanted to. The passion in both their eyes was so intense it gave them both goosebumps.

He heard her let out a small moan and that spurned him on to deepen the kiss further. It was a frenzy of hands, lips and tongues as they couldn't get enough of each other.

Castle was quickly losing any self restraint he had. Kate was relentless though, her hand moved to his neck and she grabbed a fistful of his hair. The passion in her was reaching fever point too.

She pressed her body into his, trying to mould herself to him. She could feel the rhythm of his heart pounding, matching her own.

His lips moved down to her neck as he peppered soft kisses along it, reaching her ear. Gently blowing it, his tongue darted out to tease the lobe as he sucked it.

"Castle." She groaned out, pulling him back to her mouth.

When they did finally break, both of them were breathing hard.

"My god Kate, do you have any idea what you do to me?"

The fact that she was almost straddling him, gave her an indication that she did. "Well, if it comes close to what you are doing to me, then yes, I do." She whispered. "I think it's safe to say you can turn off the fire now." She added.

He dragged her to a standing position and because he could not bear to break contact, walked her towards the fire and turned it off. He spun back around kissed her again, as he playfully pushed her back to the couch.

He has a serious look on his face as he sat them down.

"Is something wrong?" she asked.

"Are we okay? I mean this work thing. We'll sort it out together, deal with whatever is thrown at us?"

"Yes Rick, we're okay. We'll do this together, all of it." She reassured him.

That was all he needed to hear as he laid her down on the couch. This was a new chapter for both of them.

Unlike the fire that he had just put out, their love would never need to be stoked.

**A/N So there we have it, final chapter. Was everyone happy with how things turned out? I hope so. A huge big thank you for taking the time to read this and leave a review. It made me a happy camper. Hopefully see you all again next time.x**


End file.
